TIME DOES NOT HEAL
It’s a lie !!!
These statements and similar ones - “Time heals all things, It takes time to heal, Give it time to heal” can so often be heard, when someone is going through a tough time. Let me be frank with you - Time on it’s own does not heal. Time is merely an indication of past and present. It has become a welcome excuse, to give our pain the right to stay as long as it wants, to make a home in our hearts, minds and emotions. We give, permission for this pain, shame and guilt to sabotage our movement forward all in the name of “Time Heals”
Harsh words, maybe for some, but hear me out before you dismiss my straightforwardness.
HEALING COMES FROM
WHAT IS DONE WITHIN
OUR TIME CONSTRAINTS
within the duration of past and present. It is our thought process that emulates into actions, that take us from broken to beautiful. It is the courage to face the pain in all it’s ugliest forms, it is a transformational belief system that translates into transformational healthy living. Emotional healing and well being, begins in our minds first and if the seed of transformation is not first planted here, then we are in danger of adopting an easy, prolonged out, to fulfilling a transformed life.
A question that seems to pop up on my Facebook news feed from various support groups of women from all over the world, all nationalities, ages, socio economics and religions. Women who are desperately trying to navigate their way through the general statements of “TIME healing all things”.
I SPENT 24 YEARS OF MY LIFE IN SELF
DESTRUCTIVE, BEHAVIOUR'S AND PATTERNS,
THAT RESULTED IN HIDDEN MISCARRIAGES,
ABORTIONS, PROSTITUTION AND ADDICTIONS
TO DRUGS AND ALCOHOL.
I have now been walking with God for nineteen years. I have discovered what drove me to the brink of hopelessness. There were three things. The need and desire: To be loved, To belong and To be valued! Time cannot quench those 3 vital things, only God can quench them. God has set me inside a set time to access these things, through Him. So often we will be so entrenched in our culture and environments that we become so accustomed to how it fits and looks on us, that when we are presented with a new way of thinking, new relationships, new love, new surroundings, we shun the possibility of newness and opt for what is familiar over what is better.
We choose familiar, over the courage of discovering new levels of who God is. Our fear shadows His love for us. It took me developing new mindsets, fresh and new perspectives of how I would respond to situations, that in the past would trigger a familiar unhealthy response and cause me to recoil back into my dysfunctional way of processing pain.
When I begun my healing journey, my behaviour patterns didn’t just disappear, the hold of shame and guilt didn’t just vanish away. It took grit and determination and the courage to believe in more, even if it meant, I was going to fail along the way. It took me magnifying God’s voice over my past, through immersing myself in His word and surrounding myself with people who kept me accountable in the process of change. It took God casting a looming shadow over the fear and causing courage to rise up within me. This courage is in each of us and can often lay dormant and forgotten when our fear takes our courage.
IT TOOK GOD CASTING A LOOMING
SHADOW OVER THE FEAR AND CAUSING
COURAGE TO RISE UP WITHIN ME.
Be transformed by the renewing of your mind – Romans 12:2, KJV
If we are to truly walk in all that God has purposed for us, then we must work on
what we are feeding our minds. Who we choose to listen to matters – online and offline. Who we allow to speak into our lives matters. What we feed will grow, therefore we need to be determined not to feed the lies of our past hurts, shame and guilt and brokenness and understand that our emotional healing and well being is birthed out of our mind. This is where transformation begins. Our grit and determination actions those thoughts into transformational living. Time in and of itself does not heal, only God can and will !
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